Is it okay for someone to be wrong about me?
Is it okay if someone thinks I am selfish when I was trying to be considerate?
Is it okay if someone thinks I’m not parenting right?
What if someone questions my posts and thinks I’ve got it wrong?
Is that okay?
In my brain, in my logical thoughts, I know it is okay. There is no possible way that all people will agree with me. Therefore, there are people that will think I’ve got it wrong, or that I’m doing it wrong.
This is life. This is normal. I KNOW this. So why do I still care sometimes?
Inside all of us, is the need to be accepted. We all have a need to be valued. We all need and want to feel loved.
Even when we know it’s not possible for 100% of the people to approve of our choices or agree with our perspectives, it is only natural that it bothers us when someone lets us know they don’t agree. It pokes at our valid need to be validated.
So now what? Are we just left to be irritated, embarrassed, hurt?
Yes. We are. That is, unless we are willing to stop entrusting all the humans to meet our needs for approval.
What’s the alternative?
Plenty of people will tell you to believe in yourself. Have your own back. Believe you are worthy no matter what.
I do agree. I can love and encourage myself for sure. I work at believing in myself and reassuring my worth. I do.
And you should love and encourage yourself too. Everyday. My clients know this is one of the things I teach on a lot.
But that is not enough. We still desire to find ourselves worthy outside of just our self approval. In fact, we usually need to believe we have a greater belonging outside of ourselves BEFORE we can truly affirm ourselves.
And there is only one true place to find that we are accepted, valuable, loved, worthy, beautiful, loveable, just right, as we were meant to be, amazing, and okay as we are. That place, or person actually, is God. You are accepted by God, always.
There is nothing to prove to God. No opinions or thoughts you have or things you say and do will change his acceptance of you. If you make a mistake, he gives you complete and perfect grace. He finds such value in you that he promises you eternity in paradise. That’s what you deserve, according to God.
One day my daughter was questioning her worth when her friends had rejected her. I promised her she was awesome, just as she is.
She asked how I knew she was awesome.
Easy I said. God made you. He is awesome. He made you in his image, to be like him. He is awesome, therefore you are awesome. And… that means your friends are awesome too.
Webster’s dictionary says awesome means terrific and extraordinary.
Yep. That is you. You were made by God, in his image. He is awesome, you are awesome.
You, my friend, are terrific. You are extraordinary. And there ain’t a dang thing you can do about it.
When someone else judges your words, choices, appearance, and questions your worth, they are wrong. I just proved you were awesome, terrific, extraordinary!
They were wrong. And that’s okay. No need to judge them back. We are all human. We all get it wrong sometimes. No big deal.
Okay then. I charge you to go forth in your awesomeness. What choice do you have?
By the way, are YOU wrong about you??
Are you telling yourself terrible things about you, even though I just proved you are awesome?
Get this FREE GUIDE and stop beating yourself up today!!!
Check out “How to Handle Relationship Tension with Maturity,” for more insight on navigating life and relationships.